That’s personal, that’s private and THAT’S MINE!

There’s something that just gets under my skin like you wouldn’t believe.

Well, there’s probably more than one thing but I’m thinking of something in particular right now -- the abuse of power or a position.

Yes it happens in the Army like any other place but I’ll be honest with you and say that in my experience it wasn’t very often. Sure you’d find a brand spanking new Sergeant E5 that got a little besides himself and wanted to strut his (or her) newly pinned on stripes but for the most part, Sergeants knew how to be Sergeants and Officers knew how to be Gentlemen. You know, like the movie. Not to say Sergeants can’t be gentlemen –I just wanted to play on that movie title, you see.

Enter Sergeant W and his wife, Mrs. W.

It’s important you know about my first encounter with Mrs. W. I had not been in Germany too long –I’d say 6 months or less. I was working in the Criminal Law Division in pre-trail and SGT W was also a Crim Law clerk working in post-trial. Previously, just before I got moved from Admin Law to Crim Law, SGT W worked in pre-trial but when I got moved over, he moved to post-trial and thus, he moved to a new desk and I took over his old desk.

Whenever a soldier gets promoted it is not unusual for the spouse/family to come to the pinning on ceremony. I myself had the privilege of pinning rank on Newsome---wait a second. That’s a spoiler for sure. Never mind that!

SGT W was getting promoted from Sergeant E5 to Staff Sergeant E6 and the ever lovely Mrs. W was invited to the ceremony. Ever lovely.

How lovely was she?

This was my first encounter meeting her.

Mrs. W was a tall black woman. She wasn’t fat and yet, she was not a thin lady by any means. She had bright brassy orange hair and I don’t mean orange in the sense of a natural hair color but orange in the sense of an orange crayon in a box –flaming orange. This particular autumn day she was wearing a white sleeveless summery dress that had big bold red flowers on it –actually, I think it had a variety of bold colors but red was the dominating color. To that end, Mrs. W paired her dress with bright red strappy sandals that she wore with black reinforced toed nylons and bold plastic red jewelry, like a chunky bead necklace and huge wide hooped plastic earrings. Keeping with the red theme, her thick full lips were audaciously painted dark red and she had streaks of deep dark pink across her checks, I guess serving the purpose of blush. Her eye lids were not left naked and had a splash of color as well, though the exact color escapes my memory. I do remember looking at her face and thinking how all those bright colors seemed to be competing against each other for attention and how harsh the colors looked against her warm brown skin. When she smiled, her bright white teeth were exposed and she had a shiny gold tooth, which seemed to reflect the red on her lips making them appear bigger and brighter. And let’s not forget the long pointy nails that were also painted bright red. You know, to match the bright red chunky beads bracelet.

[Yes Andy, I really do remember all of that detail.]

Mrs. W commanded any room she was in and not because there was some charismatic characteristic of her personality that people were drawn to but mostly out of a sense of –fear. She walked around with a chip on her shoulder so large it was almost visible to the naked eye. Her face and demeanor seemed to have a constant expression of, “What are YOU looking at?” Her attitude was apparent in her constant head bopping that tossed her plastic red hoop earrings across her face but not in any particular rhythmic musical manner.  Confidence surged out of her like the turbulent crashing waves of Niagara Falls apparent in her erect stance and the very deliberate and demanding way in which she took her steps.

It wasn’t that I didn’t like Mrs. W but I didn’t understand her. She seemed like a character that just walked right off the pages of a book and into our JAG office. I wasn’t sure how to approach her or how to have a conversation with her. She was like that, very unapproachable. It seemed like if you tried to talk to her she’d bite your head off.

Yet there was something about Mrs. W that I very much admired. When SSG W was getting promoted, Mrs. W stood there next to her husband with pride just beaming from her eyes and smile. Even the glare from the gold tooth could not conceal her pride. She stood up there like, “This is MY man and this is OUR promotion.” Yes, she owned that promotion just as much as her husband did. It was a joint effort and one she took immeasurable delight in.  But I liked the way she seemed to take immeasurable delight in her husband as well.

In JAG the promotion ceremonies took place in the Lieutenant Colonel’s office because he had these long gold drapes that made the perfect backdrop for a photo opt. They would flank the sides with the US Flag and Army flag and it made such a pretty patriotic picture. The LTC’s office was right next to the Crim Law division. Out side of the office was a wide hallway with offices on three sides and on one wall double doors that lead to a grand old staircase that went downstairs. We were on the second floor. In that hallway was a table with some refreshments; German pastries, a meat and cheese tray and some fresh breads and rolls from the German bakery. After the pinning on ceremony, everyone mingled about the hallway eating, chatting –glad to be away from work for a bit.

After getting my fill of freshly baked pastries and delicious smooth soft European cheese, I walked back into the Crim Law office to go to my desk. As soon as I walked in I stepped dead in my tracks. Sitting there at my desk was Mrs. W. She wasn’t just casually sitting there as if she just needed a place to rest her tired feet from her red strappy sandals. She was sitting at my desk as if it were her own, that commanding presence she had about her. I stood there in disbelief and unsure of what to do next. I mean, yes she was sitting at my desk but that wasn’t the problem.

You see, just before the promotion ceremony the JAG clerk had delivered our mail and set mine on my desk. Since it was time to go into the LTC’s office I did not have time to open it so I just laid it aside. I had a few letters from home and a post card I was anxious to read (I read my mail from home over and over and over and over –practically until I had it memorized word for word). Much to my disbelief, Mrs. W was sitting there at my desk, had opened my mail and was sitting there reading my letter from home!

Oh see now we moved into a whole new arena. Oh sure, maybe she was this big intimidating woman and maybe I was this 5 foot 90 pound weakling that didn’t stand a chance against her but here’s the deal . . . .

Don’t mess with my mail from home! That’s personal, that’s private and THAT’S MINE!