I Had My Moments

Maybe I did help the Korean woman, I have always wondered what happened to her . . but I wasn't always that nice and helpful.  I mean, if I thought someone was in danger I would help but often times, our clients just annoyed me.

I was in my second trimester of pregnancy and I was miserable. It was mid summer and Kansas was experiencing record heat. I was also going through a lot of personal stress (some related to the pregnancy, some not) and I had just about had it with Legal Assistance. Day in and day out it was non-stop madness and I guess this particular day I just hit a wall. It was the proverbial last straw on the camel's back.

I had long ago grown weary of people scribbling their names onto the sign-in sheet –we could not read their handwriting so I wrote at the top of the sign-in sheet, “PLEASE PRINT.” No one paid any attention to that so I put a sign just above the sign-in sheet, “PLEASE PRINT”. Still no one paid attention so I made the sign bigger and more prominent, “PLEASE PRINT LEGIBLY!” And STILL no one paid attention so I made a bigger sign that said, “IF WE CAN’T READ YOUR NAME, WE CAN’T CALL YOUR NAME! PLEASE PRINT CLEARLY!”

AND STILL PEOPLE IGNORED THE SIGN. I would stand in the waiting area with the clipboard in my hand, “Sergeant . . . Art—something . . “ No one moved. “The last name is - - A, R, T . . or maybe it starts with an O? I can’t read the writing. . Sergeant E6 . . .Ort---something or Art—something? Anyone?” No one moved. “Well, if your name has not been called you might want to come check the sign-in sheet. I can’t call your name if I can’t read it. Anyone?” Still no one moved.

FINE! I would go onto the next name. Then a short while later some Sergeant would come up to my desk all infuriated and huffy because he had been waiting so long . . . “But Sergeant, I tried to call your name, I asked everyone to come check the sign in board, the sign clearly says to print. You did not print, you signed your name and it’s impossible to read.”

That happened repeatedly so like I said; I just hit a spot where I was fed up with it and both the heat and my pregnancy had soaked up ALL of my patience. One day I went to call a name and again it was someone that signed their name, they did not print. I tried to decipher the writing and several times I called out what I thought the name to be and then said, “If your name has not yet been called you might want to come check the sign-in sheet. PLEASE print your name, do not use cursive writing.” Each time I went back to the sign-in sheet to call the next person, I checked that signature to see if someone had come back to print their name, nope.

A short time later a woman came up to my desk, said she had an appointment and had been waiting well over 45 minutes. I asked her if she signed in and she said yes so I went to the clipboard and brought it over to her. I pointed to the signature that I could not read and asked, “Is that you?” She indicated that it was. I was stunned. HOW MANY TIMES DID I ANNOUNCE TO COME CHECK THE CLIP BOARD AND PRINT YOUR NAME? I very nicely apologized to her that she had not been called but then I also explained we attempted to call her name several times and could not read it and we also made several announcements in regards to checking the clipboard to make sure your name was printed and clear. She just said, “Well, I thought mine was.” I then told her I would have to reschedule her appointment because I did not have an attorney available to see her that day because she missed her appointment. SHE WAS LIVID probably both because I told her she would have to reschedule and because of the manner in which I was speaking to her.  I was being very short and  --well, uh --rude.   We had a short exchange of words and I am not exactly sure how it came about but I finally said something to her like, “Well it’s obvious you can’t read or write!” As soon as I said that I heard the typing of the civilian secretary stop and out of the corner of my eye I could see the expression on her face was, “I can’t believe you just said that!” I pretty much could not believe I said it either but you know, it was already out there and I was not backing down. The woman started crying and saying she could not believe how badly she was being treated and asked to see my boss. The OIC was not in at the time so I went and got the attorney she was originally scheduled to see. This Captain was really nice and he was mostly on my side but he did say, “Sergeant, you really can’t talk to our clients that way.” He was right and I knew he was right. The Captain agreed to see the woman to take care of whatever legal matter she had come in for. Before she left, the Captain called me in and explained I owed the woman an apology and he was right, I really did need to apologize to her for not only what I said but also how I treated her. So I apologized but then I was crying and then she started crying again and both of us were just a mess.

In our sobs and tears, we said to each other:

“I’m sorry I said you couldn’t read or write –I was just frustrated with my job but I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. “

“Its okay, Sergeant. You are pregnant and I understand how hard it must be for you. I really did think I printed my name clearly. I did read the sign. I hope you are okay now, I hope your baby is okay. I don’t want to see you cry.”

The poor Captain was just sitting at his desk watching this tearful exchange of apologies between us.  She was actually a very nice lady; well dressed, educated, well spoken.

The Captain apologetically wrote me up. He kept saying over and over, “I’m really sorry but I have to do this.” It was not that big of a deal. Getting written up is just documentation that you had been warned about something just in case the behavior continues. I deserved it. But even in being written up the Captain wrote that I was pregnant and going through stress both on and off the job and I ordinarily was very nice and professional to our clients but I just had a bad day. He explained to me though he understood the personal stress I was under that I needed to be more patient with the clients and if I was having a difficult time reading names I was to continue to make announcements for people to come check the board.

I knew I needed to find more patience and not take my frustrations out on our clients and I knew what I said to that woman was wrong. I also thought it was ridiculous people could not clearly print their name on a piece of paper.

There was another time I had no patience with a client. I had a soldier sitting at my desk waiting for me to type up a Power of Attorney for him. He had a big wad of tobacco in his mouth and as he is sitting there, he leans over and spits in my garbage can. I looked over at him with pure disgust and said, “Don’t do that again.” He apologized but then said, “But I need to spit.” It made me so angry and like I said, I was very low on patience, so I ripped his POA out of my typewriter and slammed it on my desk and said to him, “Then you can leave and go get rid of that wad of tobacco and come back when you’re ready to conduct business.” The OIC was walking by and all he heard was, “come back when you’re ready to conduct business.” And that must have seemed odd to him both in terms of what I was saying but also because the Soldier, a Staff Sergeant (E6) out ranked me. He stopped and asked me what was going on but he said it in such a tone and demeanor as if I had done something wrong –like he was ready to intervene and make me do my job. I picked up my garbage can, showed it to him and said, “He’s spitting his chew into my garbage can.” The Captain then looked at the Staff Sergeant and said, “Oh yeah, that is disgusting.” Then he walked away. The SSG left and returned in a few minutes without his wad. I finished his POA and sent him on his way.