Don't Ask, Don't Tell

When I first heard about Clinton's "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy for the military, I laughed. Well duh! That's pretty much been the unspoken policy all along.

You see, living and working in such close quarters as we did in Germany, you just begin to know things --things you'd rather not know, things you don't understand, things you know all too well and do understand, unspoken things, unreal things . . . you just begin to catch on. Like, we all knew pretty much who was doing what. You knew the married cheaters, the ones doing drugs, the ones not doing drugs . . . even without gossip or rumors or having witnessed any of it, you just knew.

One day after work I was walking through the barracks and a female soldier approached me. Now remember I told you --we had our own "Don't ask, don't tell" policy in that --we just knew certain things about certain people . . . and I knew certain things about this certain person too. We certainly knew each other as everyone in the company knew everyone -- but I can't say we ever talked to each other. She worked in the motorpool and always seemed like "one of the guys" to me. Her female friends, which I knew little about, lived in PCS, the company next to us. So she asked me if I wanted to hang out with her and her friends or maybe go to dinner. I was stunned because I knew exactly what she was implying. There was a bit more conversation exchanged, every bit of it making me ever the more uncomfortable, and then I went back to my room. She never did talk to me again.

Now I don't know what Clinton's policy did for changing the military but back then, homosexuality was grounds for discharge from the military. In fact, it was a question asked directly when you enlisted. I worked in JAG --this is what we did; put soldiers out of the military and put soldiers in jail.

A few months after my encounter with the motor pool female soldier, one of the JAG officers, a Major, came to me. He was working on a case involving some female soldiers that lived in my barracks and he wanted to know if I knew them. Remember, we worked at the division level so most cases we worked on were not directly on Hindenburg, where we were. The Major was doing a little bit of investigative work. He understood that soldiers living in the barracks together just knew certain things about each other --and he wanted to know what I knew. At this point I had no idea what the case was about --for all I knew she could have been called as a witness to another case. He told me the soldier's name and I said, "Yeah, I know her --I think she asked me out on a date one time." The Major's eyes light up --like, he just struck gold! All excited he said, "I'm going to need a statement from you."

A statement? Woe! We just went from zero to 60 in seconds flat! A statement?

The Major went on to explain he was conducting an investigation because several women were under suspicion of being lesbians and their command was trying to chapter them out of the Army but they were each fighting it & denying they were gay. They only had sketchy evidence thus far but a statement from me would help make the case.

Okay so another unwritten unspoken (just merely understood) policy in the Army is --you don't rat each other out. I wasn't about to make a statement against someone that lived in my barracks most certainly because I had no real proof or evidence of such behavior myself. Everything I believed to be true was nothing more than speculation. I wasn't about to be party to ending a soldier's career on such grounds. I told the Major I wasn't interested in making a statement. He then laid the file on my desk and told me to read it and he'd be back.

I read the file which was a lot of speculations at best, JAG had a very weak case. I can see why he was so desperate to get a statement from me. They needed something solid to go on. While I worked in JAG, I often found myself in these predicaments; I'd know some information about a case but I wasn't able to tell anyone in the barracks or I'd know something going on in the barracks that I didn't want to tell JAG. It was like this double life, work and "home" and never shall the two collide.

The Major returned and I told him I had no statement to make and no information to give him about the case. He didn't believe me but honestly, I really didn't. Besides my reluctance to make a statement against a fellow soldier, I really had nothing on this girl. The "date" I was referring to was implied --nothing she came right out and said. Certainly, from her point, it could be argued she was just asking me to go to dinner with her, like any friend would do. I explained that to the Major and yet he kept insisting I make a statement. He took the file and left so I thought I was off the hook. But a few days later and into a couple of weeks, he'd keep coming to me and telling me I needed to make a statement. Each time I'd avoid him or put it off. He finally came to me and said, "I am giving you an official direct order to provide me with a statement and if you do not, I will see to it that punishment is imposed on you for disobeying a lawful order." I told him I was not refusing to obey his order, I simply did not have any information about the case he was working on.

It wasn't long before I was called into the Colonel's office. The Major had gone to him and told him I had information about a case he was working on and I was refusing to provide him with a statement. I stood before the Colonel at Parade Rest, to which he told me to be at ease.

"Specialist Dodge, is it true you are withholding information about a case Major D is working on?"

"No sir, that is not true."

"Are you trying to protect someone you know?"

"No sir, I am not."

"Did you tell Major D about a certain female soldier that is currently under investigations that she asked you out on a date?"

"No, I did not."

The Colonel looked puzzled, "Are you sure? You never said that to Major D?"

Dropping all military formalities I relaxed and said, "Look Sir, this female soldier approached me once and did ask me to dinner. Did she say it was a date? No. Did she make any comments to me about dating? No. Did I understand her intentions were that this was a date? Absolutely. But is that something I can put into a statement? Not really. I can't say anything that could possibly hold up in court --that I thought she might be asking me out. I read the case file and there's no solid evidence to suggest this female soldier is a lesbian and she's denying it 100%, as are all of her friends. If I thought I had something valuable to add to the case, I would but honestly, I do not. I'm not like you or Major D, Sir. When I go "home" each night its to that barracks, not to a warm home that is shared with my spouse and children. I live there. I live with those people. I don't like what is being asked of me. I want to do the right thing but I don't think my statement is going to help this case any and so if it can add no value, why should I be asked to do so?"

The Colonel stood there for a few moments in silence then he said to me he was the lawyer and he'd decide what was valuable to a case and what was not. He said he understood what I was saying but he would like for me to tell him exactly how the conversation went with this female soldier. So I told him exactly how the conversation went. He then thanked me and told me I could leave.

A day or two later Major D came to me and told me, as if it were his grand and glorious idea, he'd really not need my statement after all however; if I heard or saw anything or had any more conversations with the "motor pool soldier", to please let him know.

Last I heard JAG was never able to make their case and that particular soldier PCS'd to a new unit in the states.