Released

Being home was amazing and . . . boring. The amazing part was that initial surprise when I got to see my entire family. Even today, when I'm really down or having a particularly difficult time with a family member, I recall that moment and its an instant pick-me-up. My family was gathered in the basement of my Aunt's house and when I walked down the stairs the reaction was --- well, it was indescribable is what it was. Instantly 7 months of longing, depression, wondering, sadness--it all melted away. It was as if as my family gathered around me hugging me, all those things were falling off of me like a molting bird's feathers. And once those things were gone, I discovered two things. First, I was okay. Second, my family was okay. You see though we missed each other and this reunion was exactly what I needed, life was still marching on.

I found my family to be just as I left them. I don't mean that they were boring --they were just the same. So here I was across the seas and meeting people from every walk of life and my family --they rocked steady. Amazingly, in my absence Chicago did not sink into Lake Michigan. The Sears Tower still stood tall. In fact, the city barely even knew I had left. I walked through my Army life with Chicago tattooed on my heart and soul and that city, not only did it not miss me, it didn't need me. My family missed me but they didn't need me --their lives went on without me and I realized, my life had to go on too.

The week at home was much needed. I was so thankful my Dad and step-mom asked me to come. It refreshed me and energized me. It took away all those ill feelings I had been harboring for 7 months. I'll never forget any of that --but what that week home did for me that was the most important --it released me. My heart was free to go back to Germany to live and to love. I was no longer bound, I was released. I had received my final nudge out of the nest and so both literally and figuratively, I flew back to Germany.